Sunday, February 17, 2008

I am stronger then yesterday

Wow. Well. It’s done. I am no longer how I was born. I am changed. Though I KNOW I have physically altered my body, I don’t feel it (besides the pain I have been in). I still feel like the same Alicia. Though, the reason I might not be feeling it is because I am still on the clear liquid diet. However, I think on this post side of surgery it is easier, I do feel fuller and more satisfied. I am still missing the feeling of eating though.

About surgery. I was basically on the verge of tears the whole car ride. I drove there with my Aunt Theresa with my parents and Erica closely following. Aunt Theresa did her best to keep my mind off the surgery though not trying to let on that she was trying to keep my mind off of surgery. It was good though. We laughed, talked, and the funniest thing is ... I don’t really remember what we talked about. All I know is that it really helped whatever it was. I arrived at Methodist hospital at about 8:30. Nerves were high. I think mostly it was the unknown that was freaking me out. I had never had major surgery. I had never gone under. Tina met us at the hospital, it was great to have her (and everyone's) support. Tina is 4 years out from gastric bypass and has kept it all or most of her weight off since then! She truly the sole person I looked to for MANY of my answers during this process and I don’t know what I would do without her. After getting checked in I had to go to the lab to get some blood drawn. Then, I sat with my family for a while and talked. Mostly about things... again... I do not remember. Being brought up to pre-surgery area was tough. I was fighting back tears the whole time. Still thinking about it, it makes me nervous. I got changed and then my nurses came to get me ready for surgery. Though I drank a ton of water the night before surgery, they still had a hard time finding a vain for the IV. Other than that it was just a lot of questions being asked and papers to be signed. Then the family and friends came up to say goodbye. Everyone was so supportive and positive which really helped. But I was crying like a baby. Erica, Aunt Theresa and Dad were the first to come (I had so many people they had to send them up in waves). All 3 of them told me not to worry and just gave me kisses and touches that made me calm down a little bit. Dr. Svendsen (my surgeon) came in an explained what he was going to do during surgery; I understood most of it through my tears! Mom and Tina were the last people to leave the pre-op area. Mom was nervous, I could tell. She was telling the nurses everything under the sun about what problems she has with anesthesia but... hey she is my mom, that is what she is suppose to do! Tina knew everything was going to be great and having the solid rock there was what I needed. Once I said goodbye to mom and Tina, it was time to go to the surgery room. I had stopped crying by this time, so that was good. Going into the room was a bit bizarre. I am being wheeled in on a bed, and all I can see is the ceiling, and then I get wheeled into this really white and bright room and all these people with masks are introducing themselves to me and I am thinking... crap.... its bright. I couldn't think of anything else. It was kind of humorous. But then things got serious. I moved from my bed to the table where they were going to operate and the anesthesiologist came over to me to get me the anesthesia. She tells me to breath in, and I do it, she tells me to breath in again, and I do it, and then she tells me one last time, take a big breath in, and from there, I don’t remember anything. Pretty weird feeling. From there I woke up in the post op area. What I remember is pretty vague. I know I was pretty whiney. I remember not liking my post op nurse because she wasn't very nice. Also, I can remember being really uncomfortable. I believe I was in the post-op area for about an hour and a half. I still was really out of it though; I got wheeled to my room where my lovely family and friends were waiting. I remember saying some things but I don’t remember everything. I do however remember Erica talking a picture of me.... brat. (See below)

From there the next 3 nights/4 days I spent in the hospital. I was only supposed to be there for 2 nights / 3 days. I was having problems with not keeping myself hydrated and I was also having trouble with getting sick a lot. Obviously I have the same reactions to anesthesia like my mom and sister. Boo. But the people were really nice. Everyone made me feel comfortable though I wasn't most the time.

I have been out of the hospital now for 2 1/2 days. Today is the first day I am feeling good. I haven't had to take any of my liquid pain meds and I have been feeling over all like me! So that is nice. Hence, why I am writing this blog. It’s the first time I have felt up to doing anything! So that is a positive sign. I am still on my clear liquid diet, which is tough. But after my post op on 2/19 I will be able to move on to full liquids, which are things with flavor!! wo wo! :D

Thanks again to everyone for all the cards, presents, support and love. I couldn't have made it through this without everyone! I love you all!
The sexiness that is me after surgery.... thanks erica!:


5 comments:

seaexplore said...

YAY! I'm glad to hear you're back blogging. Sounds like it went pretty darn smoothly. Good going.

Erica said...

Haha.. you know you love me. You were pretty out of it so I thought you'd forget I had taken it at all. :) I'm so glad you're feeing better and that things are progressing like they should. We love you and are proud of you!

seaexplore said...

hey! how are you doing? it's been a while since you got out of surgery! I'm hoping you're doing well. 8o)

Erica said...

OMG. UPDATE dammit!

seaexplore said...

LOL- be nice to your sister!

(BTW- you need to update!) LOL 8o)